Oh, the crazy things that go on here in the workshop! Look how many of you are undignified. What has become of us, as a culture? In my days -- even when I was just a pup -- I strove for dignity. I would never call myself undignified, even in an anonymous poll.

But clearly times are changing. I will try to change too. I consider myself a modern Professor, so I insist on keeping up with the latest fads. I will try to be undignified. I will lose some dignity. Back to the workbench to figure out how!